King Leopard
Full Member
The ORIGINAL douche canoe
Posts: 201
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Post by King Leopard on Mar 12, 2009 11:02:46 GMT -5
OK, now I know I'm not the only one that misread the title as "Getting rid of Jews".
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Post by antichrist on Mar 12, 2009 11:08:05 GMT -5
I've tried preaching back at them, they just come back with bigger numbers.
For women one of the best I ever did was...
Me: So according to your religion, a woman is supposed to submit to her husband and obey him? JW: Well, yeah, uh.... Me: Good, my husband doesn't want me to talk to you.
They don't seem to have a response for that one.
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Post by Madame Scarlet on Mar 12, 2009 12:38:44 GMT -5
I personally would have chased them with the dildo. It would have been pretty epic. I was pretty disappointed that he didn't grab the dildo. Fundies are terrified of sex toys.
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Post by gotpwnt on Mar 12, 2009 14:36:37 GMT -5
I lol'd.
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Post by Old Viking on Mar 12, 2009 15:03:34 GMT -5
If that didn't happen, it should have.
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Post by Aqualung on Mar 12, 2009 15:26:44 GMT -5
I personally would have chased them with the dildo. It would have been pretty epic. I was pretty disappointed that he didn't grab the dildo. Fundies are terrified of sex toys. I thought that was going to happen too. ;D But then he went for the sword--epic nonetheless.
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Post by Vene on Mar 12, 2009 17:29:31 GMT -5
You could always use both. Wear a strap on while chasing the fundies with a sword.
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Post by Lady Renae on Mar 12, 2009 23:13:57 GMT -5
My fiancee mentioned once that an old lady stopped by and began pestering her. When she said we weren't interested and started closing the door, the lady poured holy water on our front doorstep. If I was home, I would have loved to scream and yell, "Quick, get the blood! Get the Boooood! (turning to the lady and slowly grinning) Wait....Wait....you have blood...you have LOTS of blood!" THIS!!!
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Post by DarkfireTaimatsu on Mar 12, 2009 23:23:17 GMT -5
You know you live in a boring suburb in a boring town in a boring corner of a boring state when boring JWs have never boringly knocked on your boring door.
Seriously, I've never had one, and thus never had to get rid of one. Sorry, guys.
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Post by Thejebusfire on Mar 12, 2009 23:27:41 GMT -5
My fiancee mentioned once that an old lady stopped by and began pestering her. When she said we weren't interested and started closing the door, the lady poured holy water on our front doorstep. If I was home, I would have loved to scream and yell, "Quick, get the blood! Get the Boooood! (turning to the lady and slowly grinning) Wait....Wait....you have blood...you have LOTS of blood!" I would have done that.
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Post by antichrist on Mar 13, 2009 0:32:46 GMT -5
You know you live in a boring suburb in a boring town in a boring corner of a boring state when boring JWs have never boringly knocked on your boring door. Seriously, I've never had one, and thus never had to get rid of one. Sorry, guys. Really? I used to get them when I lived on a farm that was 45 minutes from a town of 2000 people. The nearest largest city (100,000) was 3 hours away. I remember one following me around while I was going from building to building picking up stuff and ignoring her except for the odd grunt. The thing that finally got her to shut up is when I pointed to a mountain and said, "look the horses escaped, they were spotted up there, unless you're planning on helping me, I've got to go". I guess converting people isn't worth a long hike.
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Post by ironbite on Mar 13, 2009 1:05:21 GMT -5
If I ever get converted at by a Mormon or JW...I'm claiming I'm Jesus.
Ironbite-just to see what happens.
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Post by caretaker on Mar 13, 2009 1:17:55 GMT -5
Never even seen a JW here, but unfortunately we're a short cough away from a Mormon church thingy. And the sneaky bastards always send the hot young American out with the decrepit old Belfastian; it's just cruel. Unfortunately, I haven't had a chance to be rude to them, because by some stroke of dumb luck, I always meet them when I'm leaving the off-license. It usually goes like this:
Mormon #1: Hello. Me: *Cough* Hi. Mormon #2: How are you? Me: *Meaningful look at bag* Sober for the next two minutes. Anything else, fellas? Mormons: Nope, take care.
*Shrug* The neighbourhood doesn't mind them. They're not dumb enough to try pestering; they usually just ramble and try and chat to people, and are easily dismissed.
Street-corner preachers, on the other hand, regularly face my wrath. I was a bit disappointed that MisterMuncher and me didn't bump into any yesterday...
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Post by mistermuncher on Mar 13, 2009 3:31:17 GMT -5
Aye, right. Street Preachers? At a Peace Demo? Some fucking chance.
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Post by Bojangles on Mar 13, 2009 5:29:35 GMT -5
We get so many JWs around our place it isn't funny ... and always at fucking 7.30 am on Saturdays.
And they always start with "we'd love to tell you about a wonderful man named Jesus".
One time we even got an invite to a praise and worship meeting where they wanted you to come dressed as your favourite bible character. And then after praise and worship they would have a bible play. I didn't know the JWs did that, but hey...
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