This one actually needs a bit of back story. I have a really good friend who's a nice guy but has terrible luck in the bedroom. He was going to sleep with his current girlfriend for the first time and didn't want to mess up so he asked me, a woman who doesn't sleep with men, for advice. I told him to keep a strong but random rhythm to keep a really well-known song in his head and go along with that. This was what woke me while reading the online paper this morning.
Alliance Onward says: I owe you so many beers Shrewish Fairy says: So it worked? Shrewish Fairy says: What song did you use? Alliance Onward says: Yes it worked. And I was so nervous the only song I could think of was Stars and Stripes. Shrewish Fairy says: Fantastic. Alliance Onward says: The piccolo solo was a bitch but apparently it was worth it
]Bill Maher as Satan: And if you choose to serve me, I'll crucify your soul. ... Not a great offer.
Post by Admiral Lithp on Jul 27, 2010 19:01:54 GMT -5
That's awesome. I should keep that in mind. 'Course, knowing me, I'd immediately think "One Winged Angel."
Lady Eliac says: I can't take this from you two right now. *Lady Eliac has left the conversation.* A Pimp Named Snail Army says: Brofist. Harley Rock 'N' Roll Sherpa says: Brofist.
Not long after, in the same window:
A Pimp Named Snail Army says: Dude, we were getting along so well. Why did you have to ruin it with ass? Why did you let ass come between us? Harley Rock 'N' Roll Sherpa says: I will gently ass fist you. A Pimp Named Snail Army says: Gross. But it's better than aggressive, I suppose.
"I'll have to keep an eye out for male genitals next time I'm looking at statues of naked women."~MaybeNever
"[Lithp] has an avatar that looks like a seedy goth opening the door to a pair of Jehovah's Witnesses after a hard nights drinking."~tolpuddlemartyr
"Obama bows before the muslim world and fundies go apeshit. Bush goes on a date with it and they have no problem."~Tgrwlf
Transcript of a convo with Shykid and Damen. Shy was seeing if he still had pictures of his penis on his computer (don't ask).
Damen: What's up, guys? L: Shy's trying to find his penis. Damen: That's really not something you should lose. Shy: Well, I know it's around here somewhere... *a few minutes later* Shy: This isn't turning out too good. I was looking for my penis and I found my mom. *Shy sends various pictures* Shy: The weird thing is, I found all of these pictures while I was looking for my penis. L and Damen: You still haven't found it yet?
No, actually, we were talking about the nude pics we've seen and taken being foolish. That made me curious if I still had the ones I had taken, though if you wanna see my penis, I'm sure that can also be arranged, provided I can find it on here... (Kidding.)
Also, guys, so this is kinda on topic, here's a morsel of a conversation I just had with my cousin:
Her: im not racist but..... Her: most black people arent civilized Me: excuse me? Her: yeah...look at africa lol Me: yeah i see what you mean Me: africa has always been a savage and war-torn continent rife with poverty Me: clearly because it's also a hotbed of dark people with lots of melanin in their skin. Me: i mean Me: meanwhile in europe, that land of milky-white complexions Me: it's never had any bad things like Me: wars, violence, slavery, feudalism, imperialism, and stuff like that Me: everyone has always hugged each other and gotten along and stuff Me: because of their kind, pure hearts overflowing with whiteness! Her: im sorry Her: i didnt mean to offend u Her: u dont have to get an attidue lol Her: whats feudalism
I'm totally aching to reuse that sarcasm to pwn some more racists and look half witty. *watches RSTDT like a hawk*