I don't love fundamentalism so much, because I was raised in it (ex-YEC/Catholic fundie here). It's not so easy to escape once you're in it, but FSTDT helps. Being able to laugh at what once terrified you is a great motivator.
"So, because you are lukewarm--neither hot nor cold--I am about to spit you out of my mouth." (Revelation 3:16)
That excludes the following neutral alignments: Neutral, Neutral Good, Neutral Evil, Lawful Neutral, Chaotic Neutral
Jesus came to Earth to bring division(which creates chaos).
New International Version (NIV)
34 “Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35 For I have come to turn “‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— 36 a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’
49 I have come to cast fire upon the Earth; and how I wish it were already kindled! 50 But I have a baptism* to undergo, and how distressed I am until it is accomplished! 51Do you suppose that I came to grant peace on earth? I tell you, no, but rather division; 52 for from now on five members in one household will be divided, three against two and two against three. 53 They will be divided, father* against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law. (Luke 12:49-53)
That excludes the following lawful(order and opposite of chaos) alignments: Lawful Good, Lawful Neutral, Lawful Evil
Jesus said he was not good.
"Why do you call me good?" Jesus answered. "No one is good--except God alone. (Luke 18:19)
That excludes the following good alignments:Lawful Good, Neutral Good, Chaotic Good
After a process of elimination, there is only one possible alignment for Jesus Christ.
Chaotic Evil is referred to as the "Destroyer" or "Demonic" alignment. Characters of this alignment tend to have no respect for rules, other people's lives, or anything but their own desires, which are typically selfish and cruel. They set a high value on personal freedom, but do not have any regard for the lives or freedom of other people. They do not work well in groups, as they resent being given orders, and usually behave themselves only out of fear of punishment. It is not compulsory for a Chaotic Evil character to be constantly performing sadistic acts just for the sake of being evil, or constantly disobeying orders just for the sake of causing chaos. They do however enjoy the suffering of others, and view honor and self-discipline as weaknesses. Serial killers and monsters of limited intelligence are typically Chaotic Evil. According to the Complete Scoundrel sourcebook, Carl Denham from King Kong and Riddick from Pitch Black are Chaotic Evil. The chaotic evil outsiders are the Tanar'ri (Demons).
In addition, if I entertain the idea that the mythology in the Bible is real and that the dragons, satyrs, cockatrices and unicorns also mentioned in D&D are real, Jesus being Chaotic Evil explains why he is God.
God = Satan
"AND again the anger of the LORD was kindled against Israel, and he moved David against them to say, Go, number Israel and Judah." (II Samuel 24:1) "AND Satan stood up against Israel, and provoked David to number Israel."(I Chronicles 21:1)
"I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you this testimony for the churches. I am the Root and the Offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star." (Revelation 22:16)
Morning Star = Lucifer
New International Version (NIV)
12 How you have fallen from heaven, Morning Star , son of the dawn! You have been cast down to the earth, you who once laid low the nations! 13 You said in your heart, “I will ascend to the heavens; I will raise my throne above the stars of God; I will sit enthroned on the mount of assembly, on the utmost heights of Mount Zaphon. 14 I will ascend above the tops of the clouds; I will make myself like the Most High.” 15 But you are brought down to the realm of the dead, to the depths of the pit.
"The historical momentum of things is creating such a bewildering social milieu that the monkey mind cannot find a simple story, a simple creation myth or redemption myth to lay over the crazy contradictory patchwork of profane techno-consumerist post-McLuhanist electronic pre-apocalyptic existence." ~ Terence McKenna
Stop right there. Any fundie will tell you that D&D is Satanic. They'll also accuse you of cherry-picking the Bible, by the way.
When a conservative says that a group of people are freedom fighters, they are certainly wrong. When a liberal says that a group of people are freedom fighters, they are equally wrong. When a dictatorship is overthrown by a legitimate and stable democracy that does not itself collapse [...], then and ONLY then can we say that the people who overthrew the previous government were freedom fighters.