|
Post by DeadpanDoubter on Jul 9, 2009 13:07:44 GMT -5
I had a friend who got a house call from a Jehovah's Witness. The first time he admitted to the Witness that he was gay, they argued, and he asked him not to return. When the Jehovah's Witness came back to solicit again, he pecked the Jehovah's Witness on the lips, and the poor guy ran away screaming, as if he were burned. Ehh, the guy probably liked it, and that's why he ran. "OH NO THE DEMONS ARE GETTING ME!"
|
|
|
Post by renaissanceblonde on Aug 9, 2009 18:41:34 GMT -5
Update:
They came around again, two littlle old biddies this time. Mum pretty much told them to rack off because she wasn't interested, and that the sheeple should go back to the steeple. Well, they left (sounding highly offended) and I went for a walk about ten minutes later. They were still proselytising in my street, so I bleated as I went past.
So... is that my crowning moment of awesome?
|
|
|
Post by anti-nonsense on Aug 10, 2009 1:58:59 GMT -5
Your mom is awesome, and so are you.
We get the JW around here sometimes, my dad likes to debate with them, I just ignore them.
|
|
|
Post by lunarxero on Aug 10, 2009 2:25:29 GMT -5
I'm to nice for my own good. I just politely say I'm not interested. But your mother is awesome.
|
|
|
Post by peanutfan on Aug 10, 2009 12:37:33 GMT -5
I'd have invited them in and asked if they wanted some drinks while they waited or would they rather just join in the orgy I was having with the rest of my family?
|
|
|
Post by HarleyThomas1002 on Aug 10, 2009 23:20:22 GMT -5
|
|
|
Post by antichrist on Aug 11, 2009 15:52:18 GMT -5
Mouldsville ~ I love it, this is my new name for Chilliwack/Fraser Valley
As for the JW's my favourite way of dealing with them was.
Me: According to your religion, a woman is to obey her husband? Him: Well, yes, but.... Me: Good, my husband doesn't want me to talk to you.
|
|
|
Post by Maryland Bear on Aug 12, 2009 6:38:33 GMT -5
The JW's once caught me in a really pissy mood.
I could tell they were door to door religion saleswomen when I looked out the window, so I yelled out through the door "Go away!"
They apparently didn't hear me, because a a little while later, I heard them stuff some literature in the door. I then opened the door, threw the literature into the yard, and yelled "what part of 'go away' do you not understand?"
I felt bad about it later. It was utterly rude on my part and my only excuse was I was in a fould mood.
|
|
|
Post by Hades on Aug 12, 2009 11:07:58 GMT -5
That was awesome lol
|
|
|
Post by Admiral Lithp on Aug 12, 2009 23:52:53 GMT -5
The JW's once caught me in a really pissy mood. I could tell they were door to door religion saleswomen when I looked out the window, so I yelled out through the door "Go away!" They apparently didn't hear me, because a a little while later, I heard them stuff some literature in the door. I then opened the door, threw the literature into the yard, and yelled "what part of 'go away' do you not understand?" I felt bad about it later. It was utterly rude on my part and my only excuse was I was in a fould mood. Shoving your beliefs down someone's throat is kind of rude, too. Just sayin'.
|
|
|
Post by The_L on Aug 13, 2009 20:40:09 GMT -5
My favorite story about Jehovah's Witnesses is still The Other People.But there are some really good responses in this post too.
|
|
|
Post by Jack Bauer on Aug 17, 2009 9:32:56 GMT -5
In my time I have done many, many, many, many, many bad things to 'visiting' JWs - including answering the door in a 'realistic' halloween zombie mask complete with dripping blood and and a pulsating eyeball (powered by a squeeze bulb) dangling in and out of the socket.
Last time they called, I knelt down on my doormat and asked them to join me in praising the Lord.
This was greeted with surprised enthusiasm.
Unfortunately, the Lord I was referring to was not their Lord - and the prayer was mos def not the sort of thing to be served up in god fearin' company.
"Oh, Lord Baphomet, we give thanks for your satanic goatiness and enormous genitalia..."
Get my drift?
The JWs haven't bothered me for a while.
I'm hatching a special surprise for the Mormons who are due in a couple of weeks or so.
|
|
|
Post by Admiral Lithp on Aug 19, 2009 12:28:00 GMT -5
Answer the door in a manner that mimics your avatar.
|
|