Post by Art Vandelay on Dec 19, 2009 20:07:18 GMT -5
Well, as most of you know, I've been an atheist almost all my life, believing there to be no evidence at all of any god and the whole concept to be a pile of steaming dog vomit.
How wrong I have been.
For you see folks, the evidence is right here, it's just taken me so long to see it. Now I know what you're be thinking, "but the bible is a self-contradicting, incoherent pile of bronze age myths cobbled together by a bunch of Roman politicians! Surely it cannot even come close to anything resembling truth". To which I would say you are correct, however it is not the bible or indeed any current religion which is the truth.
You see, there are many misconceptions people hold regarding gods, most believe they're either in another dimension or planet or some shit. Not true, they inhabit the earth and live just like any regular human. They're born, go to school, work, grow old and die just like any of their subjects.
Now you may be wondering where they are. Well, a very small number are scattered around the world. However the majority inhabit and rule a single, deceptively small and unasuming nation. How do I know this? Well, the biggest clue lies in the culture of a tiny cluster of islands, dominated by two relatively large ones, known collectively as New Zealand.
This clue lies in the first line of their national anthem "God defend New Zealand". This may seem like a rather irrelevant little tidbit from the days when christianity played a much larger role in the governments of western nations. However this is simply not so. It is essentially a request to the real gods to defend this small country.
Now you may be wondering who is this god nation of whom they speak (or sing)? Mother Britain? That is impossible, as the British are geographically do distant and have nowhere near the nessecary power projection capabilities. How about the USA, most dominant military power by far and overall defender of democracy extrodinaire? No, New Zealand's anti-nuclear policy is simply not compatible with America's largely nuclear powered navy.
So that leaves just one country, one small, rather insignificant country who's been willing and (debatebly) able to defend New Zealand, from the first European settlement to this very day. That nation is none other than Australia.
So now you know the truth, the gods, supreme masters of the universe reside here on planet earth in the form of the Australians, with New Zealand as their prophet. All who read this, rejoice, spread the good news of your (questionably) benevolent lords, cast aside all false prophecies and shower your Australian masters with all the wealth you can get, lest you be looked up unfavourably in the next life. So spread the one true faith my flock! Spread it!
How wrong I have been.
For you see folks, the evidence is right here, it's just taken me so long to see it. Now I know what you're be thinking, "but the bible is a self-contradicting, incoherent pile of bronze age myths cobbled together by a bunch of Roman politicians! Surely it cannot even come close to anything resembling truth". To which I would say you are correct, however it is not the bible or indeed any current religion which is the truth.
You see, there are many misconceptions people hold regarding gods, most believe they're either in another dimension or planet or some shit. Not true, they inhabit the earth and live just like any regular human. They're born, go to school, work, grow old and die just like any of their subjects.
Now you may be wondering where they are. Well, a very small number are scattered around the world. However the majority inhabit and rule a single, deceptively small and unasuming nation. How do I know this? Well, the biggest clue lies in the culture of a tiny cluster of islands, dominated by two relatively large ones, known collectively as New Zealand.
This clue lies in the first line of their national anthem "God defend New Zealand". This may seem like a rather irrelevant little tidbit from the days when christianity played a much larger role in the governments of western nations. However this is simply not so. It is essentially a request to the real gods to defend this small country.
Now you may be wondering who is this god nation of whom they speak (or sing)? Mother Britain? That is impossible, as the British are geographically do distant and have nowhere near the nessecary power projection capabilities. How about the USA, most dominant military power by far and overall defender of democracy extrodinaire? No, New Zealand's anti-nuclear policy is simply not compatible with America's largely nuclear powered navy.
So that leaves just one country, one small, rather insignificant country who's been willing and (debatebly) able to defend New Zealand, from the first European settlement to this very day. That nation is none other than Australia.
So now you know the truth, the gods, supreme masters of the universe reside here on planet earth in the form of the Australians, with New Zealand as their prophet. All who read this, rejoice, spread the good news of your (questionably) benevolent lords, cast aside all false prophecies and shower your Australian masters with all the wealth you can get, lest you be looked up unfavourably in the next life. So spread the one true faith my flock! Spread it!