I think the thought of ironbite licking Caitshidhe's ears till cows came is far more disturbing than any naked flesh we could post. Sexy thoughts are universally ruined by the introduction of farm animals.
Favorite anti-atheist argument? The "convert or you'll go to hell" argument. No arguing or scripture-quoting or anything, just an insistence I'm going to hell if I die. "Well, you're young, one day you'll see the light and come home to rest in the arms of baby jaysus! I hope you don't die before that happens. Quick, get to the converting!" It's pretty funny when they get all stuck-up with it and start going on about how they're "saved". "Well, I'm SAVED, and I'm going to HEAVEN when I die. You're gonna burn in HELL, because you're a SINNER. I'm a sinner too, but noone's perfect, and I'm FORGIVEN." I love it because there's no arguing - not even attempting to debate or prove their point. It's just this smug arrogance that they're right, I'm wrong, end of story.
And I love the smugness. So matter-of-factly telling me that I will burn forever and when I die, THEN I will know god because I'll meet him face to face and have to answer for, blah, blah, whatever.
That's swell! God sat around, NOT showing himself to a damn person (christians "simply believe" as their faith is "knowing" without proof) until AFTER they die, and then telling them, "See, you shoulda been followin' ME. All those other gods? I don't see any of them, do you? Obviously I am the one true god."
I'd be like, "Jackass! I didn't see any gods, including YOU till right fucking now! How the hell would you expect anybody to guess this religion over any other one based on the same amount of NO evidence? If you are omnipotent, why didn't you see that hiding yourself isn't a good way to acquire believers? Do you understand marketing at all? Who the fuck runs your PR department because they deserved to be fired."
Fucking schizoid. Makes that god sound like someone who builds a burmese tiger trap in the grandstands of a high school gymnasium and then blames the person---who fell in and suffered injury on sharpened spikes---for their own misfortune. "HA-ha! Looks like you shoulda just known better even though you had absolutely no reason to believe you were in danger and there is no precedent for anything like this happening! You deserve nothing but torture for eternity and by the way, I care about you more than anything in the world... which I have destroyed in the past because I just hated it so much. Have fun in hell! I'd tell you to call me when it's over, but it never will be over! Love you!
As for anti-evolution arguments, someone once told me the Earth couldn't be older than 6000 years old because all the water at the top of waterfalls would've fallen down by now.
That is the funniest and dumbest thing I've heard since I was told females don't make good mechanics because their boobs got in the way...
Here's the one I get from my mother all the time, so naturally it makes my blood boil:
"If you don't find God, you'll never be happy."
And by God she means any god. The woman practically begged me to become Buddhist once. Anything but the dreaded atheism.
I've only encountered that briefly but yeah, what the fuck?
If a person is say a christian, and they feel yahweh is the "One True God tm", wouldn't not being convinced like an atheist be less of an insult than to actively persue one of the "other teams" so to speak? Not that I view buddism that way exactly, it isn't like a deified-churchy-worshippy thing but more of a philosophy-way of life thing (actually closer to what many atheists follow as opposed to other religions), but still.
Is atheism so scary? Is, "Not believing in gods" like some kind of "fear of the dark/unknown" thing? Maybe, with american christians at least, the biblical shit is so deeply rooted in holidays, birthdays, seasons, culture in general that removing that aspect from their lives would change it too radically for them to handle? It's supposed to be separation of church and state but the notations on money and govt buildings show this is not the case. The christian god permeates nearly all of american culture and maybe the thought of it not being there just changes things too much for them and puts them on edge.
It's like they see christianity as eating ordering pizza or going to a Pancake Feed, Islam like going out for Thai or Bosnian food, Judaism is going for sushi and to them, atheism isn't even a restaraunt at all. To many it's nonsensical and pointless like being hungry and going to an electronics warehouse to chew on remote control units and drink rat poison and then stating you were never really hungry to begin with.
In reality it's more like eating at home in that I can have whatever I want and it will always be something THAT I want.
"Would it hurt to just believe in God, just to be on the safe side?"
Yeah God, I didn't really believe in you, but I was terrified of burning in Hell so I went with it. What? You're not the actual God? I was worshipping the wrong one? Crap!
Of course, then they say their God is the One True God and all the others are false. Then I come back with asking that, if God knew they other so-called gods didn't exist, why didn't he say that in the First Commandments? Rather than say, "All other gods are make-believe. Only I am real," Mr. Big shot from above says, "You shall not worship Any Other gods but me."
So that means God Did in fact believe in other gods, so picking the right one is basically a crap-shoot.
"But the Bible says (insert some B.S. statement that's supposed to be relevant."
Man, I get all this and I'm Not an athiest!
"TV Tropes must be one of the few places you can type "kitten" in the search engine and wind up reading about the mafia" TVTropes.org
The atheists have no morals and are capable of anything really annoys me.
Stalin , Mao and Hitler used as examples bug me too.
People who talk about revolution and class struggle without referring explicitly to everyday life, without understanding what is subversive about love and what is positive in the refusal of constraints, such people have a corpse in their mouth"- Raoul Vaneigem, The Revolution Of Everyday Life
Post by BenderBRodriguez on Mar 26, 2009 14:11:23 GMT -5
Last month I was running late to a midterm and some idiot stops me and starts asking me about God and what not and I told him I was a Christian who simply chooses to keep his faith private. He responded with "you're just an atheist masquerading as a Christian" and "if you truly were a Christian, you wouldn't have a problem being late for the exam."
What a tool.
Five identical castles; each one more identical than the last
"if you truly were a Christian, you wouldn't have a problem being late for the exam."
What a tool.
That explains those graphs showing religion falling as education rises.
And the Stalin=athiesm one pisses me off. Any group that claimed to follow a 'higher power' than Stalin met the same fate. But they never let little things like facts get in the way of their persecution complex.
Oh there are so many "good" "arguments" (both of those words used so loosely that the actual meanings have been changed) that it's hard to find my favorite. The no morals one has always bothered me. I asked someone once if the only reason he hasn't killed anyone is because god told him not to. It confused him. I got "Well, it's more complicated than that..." before I walked away.
I'd have to say my favorite is the disbelief of my disbelief. "You can't mean that! You have to believe in gawd, even if it's not the right one!" was actually said to me.
The difference between 0 and 1 is infinite. The difference between 1 and a million is a matter of degree. - Zack Johnson
"I'm older than you, therefore my belief must necessarily be more correct than yours." This "argument" was made by a fundie on my college campus. He was also claimed that if I didn't know everything that could possibly be known about the function of electricity, then his god must exist, but that's just a small modification to the run-of-the-mill theist burden of proof shifting.
My other all-time favourite:
"You just know too much (about biology and the like)." Disqualified from the #1 position on the grounds that he technically didn't put it into argument form. That was just from some schmuck in the subway at Times Square. I like to stay and argue, but you're actually more likely to find the $cientologists there.
Then, of course, you can't beat this little gem, in reference to scientific evidence:
"It is becoming increasingly uncomfortable for atheist scientist to study cosmetology." (sic) This is from a forum post; the poster repeats the mistake several times, indicating true head-spinning ignorance and/or stupidity rather than a harmless typo.
This space is intentionally left blank to allow for the posting of "FAIL" images.
Not quite an argument per se (although it makes a good argument against religion), a fundie-type person once specifically told me that I had to "check [my] brains at the door and take that leap of faith."