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Post by Sleepy on Oct 16, 2010 17:52:43 GMT -5
I can't imagine that Jesus would have a very high God Point Average. God wouldn't like any of his "love thy neighbor" stuff. God is more "Dude, stone the shit out of that motherfucker!"
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Post by mistermuncher on Oct 19, 2010 4:55:20 GMT -5
Following a prolonged spell of very nasty, poorly parsed private messages and a variously irritating tendency to try and divert every topic of conversation toward how the world would be better if everyone would just be Catholics and STFU, I've cut my pet Facebook fundie loose.
I've since started receiving PM's from his wife's account, filled with the same twatbasketry. Obviously, he's the one writing them, like, but it's just descended into the cripplingly sad at this point.
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Post by Sleepy on Oct 19, 2010 14:47:39 GMT -5
"'life could be so simple if we all just learned to pray' -Hawk Nelson"
(By the way, all the quotes I've posted in this thread are coming from the same person on facebook, including this one.)
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Post by Napoleon the Clown on Oct 19, 2010 15:25:15 GMT -5
Someone on my FB friends posted a video of Kirk fucking Cameron deep-throating Jesus. (in a manner of speaking, of course)
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Post by Bluefinger on Oct 19, 2010 15:30:49 GMT -5
Someone on my FB friends posted a video of Kirk fucking Cameron deep-throating Jesus. (in a manner of speaking, of course) If it WAS a vid of Kirk Cameron deepthroating Jesus, then it would be win. Much win.
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Post by mechtaur on Oct 20, 2010 9:29:49 GMT -5
Someone on my FB friends posted a video of Kirk fucking Cameron deep-throating Jesus. (in a manner of speaking, of course) Does the phrase "Jesus Fucking Christ" mean anything to you?
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Post by mistermuncher on Oct 20, 2010 18:33:43 GMT -5
Further update: Today I received threats to my physical safety via PM from an account set up in the name of this chump's infant daughter. The fact I live nearly 4,000 miles from him now, and he has literally no sensible means by which to enact them notwithstanding, I'm getting more than a little hacked off with the whole thing.
To this end, I've blocked it again, but I'm pretty disturbed at how low he's stooping.
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Post by Napoleon the Clown on Oct 21, 2010 1:12:55 GMT -5
Dude, get ahold of the Facebook admins. If the bastard is sending threatening messages tell them and he loses his FB access. IP bans are a bitch.
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Post by tolpuddlemartyr on Oct 21, 2010 1:49:04 GMT -5
Of course if he really had a hotline to God he could have asked him to smite you from 4,000 miles away.
I'd bring the matter to his attention but attention is probably the last thing he needs right now.
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Post by Sleepy on Oct 21, 2010 14:29:07 GMT -5
"Have you ever wanted to reach up and touch the sky Have you ever wanted to pack it up and say good-bye Have you ever wanted someone to care ...Have you ever wanted someone to be there I have tasted of a love so wide That it stops all my time I have tasted of a love so deep That it blows my mind He is sweet, He is sweet What your looking for Is my sweet, sweet Jesus What You're looking for Is my sweet Lord"
A poem someone posted. It translates so easily into a sexual version.
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Post by Art Vandelay on Oct 21, 2010 14:36:10 GMT -5
...Seriously, I cannot believe there is some Christian poet writing these things with a straight face. "Tasted a love so deep it blows my mind", how the fuck do you not read it as sexual? I swear, "I Touch Myself" is more subtle then this Christian stuff.
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Post by The_L on Oct 21, 2010 15:03:14 GMT -5
...Seriously, I cannot believe there is some Christian poet writing these things with a straight face. "Tasted a love so deep it blows my mind", how the fuck do you not read it as sexual? I swear, "I Touch Myself" is more subtle then this Christian stuff. "I don't want anybody else, when I think of Jesus, I touch myself..." You people need to stop putting these thoughts into my mind.
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Post by Art Vandelay on Oct 21, 2010 16:00:23 GMT -5
...Seriously, I cannot believe there is some Christian poet writing these things with a straight face. "Tasted a love so deep it blows my mind", how the fuck do you not read it as sexual? I swear, "I Touch Myself" is more subtle then this Christian stuff. "I don't want anybody else, when I think of Jesus, I touch myself..." You people need to stop putting these thoughts into my mind. Swap "I touch myself" for "he touches me" and you have a typical Christian song. The hilarious part is that the previous statement is hardly an excaduration at all...
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Post by Napoleon the Clown on Oct 21, 2010 17:55:16 GMT -5
I feel His hard throbbibg love within When His love flows forth It feels like fire consumes my skin Now I emmigrate north So Jesus can fuck me in the ass
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Post by Thejebusfire on Oct 21, 2010 21:49:22 GMT -5
...Seriously, I cannot believe there is some Christian poet writing these things with a straight face. "Tasted a love so deep it blows my mind", how the fuck do you not read it as sexual? I swear, "I Touch Myself" is more subtle then this Christian stuff. "I don't want anybody else, when I think of Jesus, I touch myself..." You people need to stop putting these thoughts into my mind. If you see me on my knees, It's not because I'm weak. I'm getting stronger. If you see me start to cry, You know the reason why, I'm getting stronger!
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