|
Post by Paradox on Mar 17, 2009 20:03:12 GMT -5
Forgive me, Father Paradox, for I have sinned. I fancy girls and boys just the same. Please forgive me for my sexually perverted sin. That reminds me. Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I am jealous of bisexuals. Ego te absolvo a peccatis tuis in nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Say five Our Fathers and try not to think about other men's pink elephants. I don't think that Redhunter would consider much of a sin.
|
|
|
Post by Caitshidhe on Mar 17, 2009 20:05:02 GMT -5
Forgive me, Father Paradox, for I have sinned. I fancy girls and boys just the same. Please forgive me for my sexually perverted sin. That reminds me. Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I am jealous of bisexuals. You shouldn't be. Apparently all bisexual women are sluts trying to attract men, and all bisexual men are closet homosexuals who don't want to go all the way. And also, all bisexuals are homophobic.
|
|
|
Post by tiado on Mar 17, 2009 20:19:39 GMT -5
Too bad I'm a latecomer to this thread, I so wanted to chime in with a "badtouch" joke too.
Thanks for the good laugh, and I guess what happens in the Confessional, stays in the Confessional.
|
|
|
Post by devilschaplain2 on Mar 17, 2009 22:25:05 GMT -5
Every girl I've ever fallen for has been bisexual. I don't know why that is....well, bisexual masochists anyway. Anyone know anybody like that? I'm quite lonely
|
|
|
Post by amindfarfaraway on Mar 18, 2009 0:00:38 GMT -5
Ok, but what if we WANT Father Paradox to touch us? Is that allowed? Oops. Forgive me father, for I have sinned. Oh wait, no I haven't, I'm perfect.
|
|
|
Post by perv on Mar 18, 2009 1:15:48 GMT -5
Ok, but what if we WANT Father Paradox to touch us? Is that allowed? Then it would be Good Touch. But, no, unfortunately I don't think priests are really allowed to do that either.
|
|
|
Post by amindfarfaraway on Mar 18, 2009 2:19:55 GMT -5
Ok, but what if we WANT Father Paradox to touch us? Is that allowed? Then it would be Good Touch. But, no, unfortunately I don't think priests are really allowed to do that either. Yeah, but Father Paradox is a "speshul" kind of priest. And is the "good touch" something like Reiki? Father Pardox's good touch has the ability to heal all things that ail. ;D
|
|
|
Post by devilschaplain2 on Mar 18, 2009 9:28:53 GMT -5
Forgive me Father Paradox, for I also snort coke and set homeless people on fire.
|
|
|
Post by Sigmaleph on Mar 18, 2009 9:48:49 GMT -5
Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. I made fun of the Pope's most holy hat. I'm also jealous of bisexuals, but I'm not sorry for that one. Or the first one, come to think of it. What the hell am I doing here? *leaves*
|
|
|
Post by Paradox on Mar 18, 2009 14:17:49 GMT -5
Forgive me Father Paradox, for I also snort coke and set homeless people on fire. Ego te absolvo a peccatis tuis in nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Go through the stations of the cross and try to feel vaguely guilty whenever you buy useless shit that you don't need.
|
|
frogflayer
New Member
Sky Daddy (coming soon)
Posts: 43
|
Post by frogflayer on Mar 20, 2009 21:47:22 GMT -5
Father - is it OK with g_d to fap if I only do it while listening to Nana Mouskouri songs and thinking of puppies and flowers and not of female genitalia with clits the size of boxer's thumbs *has to wander off* *back now*
Also I once wrote a song 'Fuck like a Priest' that contained the following lyric
Listen girl though I wanna be pope I know I ain't got a hope 'cause Patrus et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti's Nothing compared to the smell of your panties
I know there is no excuse for poor lyrics and I will burn in HELL but can I bring marshmallows?
|
|
|
Post by Paradox on Mar 20, 2009 22:09:26 GMT -5
Father - is it OK with g_d to fap if I only do it while listening to Nana Mouskouri songs and thinking of puppies and flowers and not of female genitalia with clits the size of boxer's thumbs *has to wander off* *back now* Also I once wrote a song 'Fuck like a Priest' that contained the following lyric Listen girl though I wanna be pope I know I ain't got a hope 'cause Patrus et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti's Nothing compared to the smell of your panties I know there is no excuse for poor lyrics and I will burn in HELL but can I bring marshmallows? No and yes, respectively. Although I think the song is a far worse sin than the masturbation.
|
|
frogflayer
New Member
Sky Daddy (coming soon)
Posts: 43
|
Post by frogflayer on Mar 20, 2009 22:29:21 GMT -5
Father - is it OK with g_d to fap if I only do it while listening to Nana Mouskouri songs and thinking of puppies and flowers and not of female genitalia with clits the size of boxer's thumbs *has to wander off* *back now* Also I once wrote a song 'Fuck like a Priest' that contained the following lyric Listen girl though I wanna be pope I know I ain't got a hope 'cause Patrus et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti's Nothing compared to the smell of your panties I know there is no excuse for poor lyrics and I will burn in HELL but can I bring marshmallows? No and yes, respectively. Although I think the song is a far worse sin than the masturbation. I've written worse. I'll bring beer with the marshmallows though. Sit around the fire and sing a medley of John Denver's greatest hit.
|
|