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Post by rookie on Aug 4, 2009 20:43:13 GMT -5
*Tosses Ironbite a potato gun*
Here, try that. Anyways, I'm a faithful member of the Church of Rook. Our articles of faith mostly revolve around the concept of not being a douche. Asshole is fine though.
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Post by ironbite on Aug 4, 2009 20:58:35 GMT -5
*Attempts to lift a 6 foot nodachi. Eventually gives up & just stabs Ironbite with a steak knife.* That may very well have been the worst holy war/attempted robbery I have ever taken part in. ...ow.
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Post by kristine on Aug 4, 2009 23:44:51 GMT -5
Heathen! As a Jenova's witness, I know that there is no salvation, only an early trip to the Lifestream! Praise Hojo! *Maniacal laughter.* "Jenova"? "Praise Hojo" Howard Johnson hotels have their own religion?
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Post by schizophonic on Aug 5, 2009 0:18:48 GMT -5
Your main problem, Ironbite, is that the kind of people you want to attract are generally already indoctrinated elsewhere.
For example, RR would be a great place to farm if they weren't already so damn sure they followed the ONE TRUE GAWD.
There's a secondary problem, in that you're an idiot, and you've been worshipping me this entire time....A combination of my fascination with fire and your fascination with anything shiny led to an interesting plan...
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Post by Admiral Lithp on Aug 5, 2009 1:50:09 GMT -5
Heathen! As a Jenova's witness, I know that there is no salvation, only an early trip to the Lifestream! Praise Hojo! *Maniacal laughter.* "Jenova"? "Praise Hojo" Howard Johnson hotels have their own religion? The fuck're you talking about? Also, Ironbite should use tracts. They always work. Haven't you ever read a tract where someone finds a tract?
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Post by ironbite on Aug 5, 2009 2:14:52 GMT -5
Problem with that is I have no artistic ability at all.
Ironbite-and I do not worship you anymore...you don't fit in my head easily.
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Post by RavynousHunter on Aug 5, 2009 2:35:10 GMT -5
No reason you can't worship yourself. I already do, and so does Jack Chick, apparently.
[edit] #500, baby! Godhood is mine!
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Post by Admiral Lithp on Aug 5, 2009 3:43:48 GMT -5
Problem with that is I have no artistic ability at all. Ironbite-and I do not worship you anymore...you don't fit in my head easily. Neither do a lot of people who write tracts.
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Post by Vypernight on Aug 5, 2009 5:45:11 GMT -5
Sorry, I already spent my $10 contributing to the Vaginalist church, when I bought a porno DVD.
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Wompatti
Full Member
The Eternal Wombat of Doom
Posts: 178
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Post by Wompatti on Aug 5, 2009 6:09:49 GMT -5
I worship a ball of light that claims to be the personification of time itself and came from a race of beings that existed since the big bang itself. *peeks into Ironbite's ear*Yog-Sothoth, is that you? Daddy? Have you seen my dad?
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Post by Maryland Bear on Aug 5, 2009 6:24:16 GMT -5
Just join the religion for which I am an ordained minister: Church of the Divine Elvis.
I mean, how can you go wrong with a religion where fried peanut butter and banana sandwiches are used at communion and the vestments are covered in rhinestones?
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Post by Marc on Aug 5, 2009 7:24:52 GMT -5
Damn...you're all to smart. Oh well, Plan B. Ironbite-*puts a stocking over face and holds up a vaugly gun shapped potato* GIVE ME ALL YOUR MONEY! Ooh! A vaguely gun shaped potato! I'll give you $15 for that! Marc
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Post by schizophonic on Aug 5, 2009 7:55:06 GMT -5
Problem with that is I have no artistic ability at all. Ironbite-and I do not worship you anymore...you don't fit in my head easily. I'm to large to enter him...I'd be proud, except it implies I want to enter him....
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Post by RavynousHunter on Aug 5, 2009 17:27:10 GMT -5
Wait for it...wait for it...aaaand there it is. God damn it.
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Post by Deimos on Aug 5, 2009 22:35:50 GMT -5
I'm a member of the Church Of Totally Wicked Awesomeness. We branched of from the first church of Cool becuase they just dont appreciate how good it is to be awesome
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