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Post by Admiral Lithp on Jul 29, 2009 3:32:29 GMT -5
Wait, I think you have Lilith wrong. As I understand it, Lilith was Adam's first wife, Eve was the second, & the only one created from Adam.
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ldm
Full Member
Posts: 108
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Post by ldm on Jul 29, 2009 3:48:25 GMT -5
Just the title of that thread made me want to vomit. Why do women have to be taught to love their husbands? Love is supposed to come naturally and be the basis for marriage in the first place. Of course, it's easy to see why these misogynistic pricks are having such a hard time feeling loved. If you treat your partner like a second class citizen, then you deserve what you get.
I'm so glad I grew up in a family where women were treated like equals and not servants. And guess what, in my whole huge extended family there have only been two divorces in the last 4 generations.
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Post by Admiral Lithp on Jul 29, 2009 4:01:07 GMT -5
Because humans are sinners & love comes from God & some such bullshit.
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Post by clockworkgirl21 on Jul 29, 2009 4:15:17 GMT -5
Well, parts of it weren't bad. Both partners in the marriage should be responsible, committed, and thoughtful to each other.
But parts just made me laugh. Like not refusing him sex. Both partners have the right to say, "Not tonight."
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Post by Admiral Lithp on Jul 29, 2009 4:38:46 GMT -5
Yeah, but I did find myself sort of agreeing with that "don't use sex as a weapon" thing, mostly because you shouldn't manipulate the other person like that, period.
I also thought the commentary on that in the thread was stupid. I wouldn't be bothered at all if my hypothetical significant other said, "not tonight, I have a headache." The overly long rambling about "let's do this some other time," I'd just stare at her & go, "WTF are you talking about?"
In any case, what disturbed me most was that only ONCE was it suggested that any of this should apply in reverse.
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Post by Maryland Bear on Jul 29, 2009 6:01:35 GMT -5
I'm so glad I grew up in a family where women were treated like equals and not servants. And guess what, in my whole huge extended family there have only been two divorces in the last 4 generations. The same trends are shown nationally. The highest divorce (and teen pregnancy) rates are in the most religious states.
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Post by gizmoturner on Jul 29, 2009 9:39:26 GMT -5
Hmmmm. Didja notice Sarah Palin is held to a different standard by the fundies? All those wifely rules, duties and responsibilities except for the Palin exemption.
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Post by HarleyThomas1002 on Jul 29, 2009 9:54:48 GMT -5
That whole quote is so fundie crazy I think it just blew out my brain. Unfortunately, I have to finish the job for my own brain. I wonder who the Hell finds that kind of woman attractive. Clayton Middleinitial Puppington, that's who. Why? Because.
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Post by Angel Kaida on Jul 29, 2009 9:54:48 GMT -5
Yeah, but I did find myself sort of agreeing with that "don't use sex as a weapon" thing, mostly because you shouldn't manipulate the other person like that, period. ... In any case, what disturbed me most was that only ONCE was it suggested that any of this should apply in reverse. Yeah - this is basically my stance. Much of it is good advice, but when it's directed only one way, it's condescending to the man and self-effacing for the woman. Some of it is a little kooky, but eh. And about teaching women to love their husbands - I kind of assume they mean "properly." Like, teaching women to show their husbands that they love them, and not to assume that the emotion of love is enough to carry a relationship. As I said, though, it only works if it goes both ways.
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Post by tygerarmy on Jul 29, 2009 12:08:12 GMT -5
What would happen if an RR raised woman were to fall in LOVE with someone from this board and they valued her equally?
Or an RR man who falls in love with one of FSTDT women who are independant and make more moe and are better established they he is?
Deconversion, brain explosion, both?
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Post by yojetak on Jul 29, 2009 12:10:03 GMT -5
Genome. Gene pool is the sum total of all genes carried by a species. Duly noted.
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Post by antichrist on Jul 29, 2009 14:00:43 GMT -5
The only thing I thought of while reading this was "oh great, a meddling mother-in-law, I hope this woman knows what she's in for".
Hopefully son and wife move very, very far away.
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Post by schizophonic on Jul 29, 2009 15:27:48 GMT -5
I had to stop reading that. I agree with the notion that there's a lot of good advice there, if not taken from the ridiculous and sexist PoV of the posting, but I found myself grinding my teeth. A lot.
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romets
Junior Member
Posts: 59
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Post by romets on Jul 29, 2009 16:43:48 GMT -5
I'm rather annoyed by the subtext in the RR post that implies a woman has to take all the responsibility for the man's welfare, yet also has to be obedient and accommodating to him. That's a no-win situation for the woman. How are you supposed to take care of a man properly if you have to do everything he asks?
And as others in this thread have said, it's important that the husband show the same respect, thoughtfulness, and appreciation for his wife. He has an emotional responsibility to the marriage too; simply handing the wife part of his paycheck and giving her and the kids a place to stay is not enough. Marriage should be about love, and that love must come from both sides.
I am also vaguely creeped out by how interested the mother is in her potential daughter-in-law. Surely, if something went wrong in the marriage, it would be the couple's job to work things out themselves, rather than the mother telling everyone what to do? But I wouldn't expect this woman to understand that; for people like her, there's only *one* way to happiness imaginable.
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Post by yojetak on Jul 29, 2009 16:59:42 GMT -5
I am also vaguely creeped out by how interested the mother is in her potential daughter-in-law. Surely, if something went wrong in the marriage, it would be the couple's job to work things out themselves, rather than the mother telling everyone what to do? But I wouldn't expect this woman to understand that; for people like her, there's only *one* way to happiness imaginable. I got the whole "overbearing" vibe as well. It only makes me appreciate how much freedom my mother gave me relative to these control freaks.
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