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Post by Vene on Apr 1, 2009 17:59:42 GMT -5
Considering I just went through a break up you'd think I'd have all sorts of advice. Unfortunately, I don't. The only thing that's helped me has been time. Then again, I locked myself away from the world and listened to depressing music, which might not have been the smartest thing to do. But, I do have this
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Post by SimSim on Apr 1, 2009 18:22:40 GMT -5
Nothing much you really can do. Just go on with life and time takes care of it. Or at least that worked for me in the past. Although listening to music can help, I played the hell outta Sea Change by Beck.
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Post by Sleepy on Apr 1, 2009 18:37:06 GMT -5
My god, I feel like someone has beaten me with a sledgehammer. Tomorrow at school I'm just going to wander into the library and form a group hug around me of as many possible people.
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Post by Art Vandelay on Apr 1, 2009 18:40:42 GMT -5
I find alternating between violent video games and extremely sappy songs does the job for me. Haven't tested it's effectiveness on break-ups but I imagine it would be more than sufficient.
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Post by dantesvirgil on Apr 1, 2009 19:19:52 GMT -5
Well, as long as I've already got this thread started... anyone have advice on dealing with this devastating breakup? This is my first one where I actually loved the guy. I don't want to be depressed for an extended period of time. And I don't consider him an asshole like some of you may or may not think. He really is a good guy. I talked to him today after the breakup and he told me he's not going to be a jerk about it, that that behavior would be completely inappropriate. And I ate lunch with him and discussed the situation, but I need to heal. He told me that this phase can be as depressing as I make it, and that I should try to think positive. And I'm sort of pessimistic, so this is really difficult. Any help? Well, you know him better than we do, obviously. But I have to say the last person I'd be taking advice from about the breakup is the guy who did it to me. You seem to get an awful lot of input from him. That can be problematic. After all, it seems like he basically broke up with you because you weren't conforming to what he wanted you to do. I'm not trying to be a jerk--I just want you to think of yourself in this situation; because it seems like you put an awful lot of effort into him. You need that energy right now. Having him around to tell you how to cope with what he did to you just doesn't make sense to me.
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Post by Sleepy on Apr 1, 2009 20:19:58 GMT -5
Having him around to tell you how to cope with what he did to you just doesn't make sense to me. You are right here, but I'm not exactly making rational decisions with this emotional instability right now. Suddenly having less contact with him isn't an easy transition. I don't think I quite understand it yet. I have been talking to other people (that I actually know) trying to cope with this, which can help me immensely in this time. But it's only been 24 hours and it feels like time is dragging so much.
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Post by deliciousdemon on Apr 2, 2009 2:44:00 GMT -5
Having him around to tell you how to cope with what he did to you just doesn't make sense to me. You are right here, but I'm not exactly making rational decisions with this emotional instability right now. Suddenly having less contact with him isn't an easy transition. I don't think I quite understand it yet. I have been talking to other people (that I actually know) trying to cope with this, which can help me immensely in this time. But it's only been 24 hours and it feels like time is dragging so much. Yeah there is no real way to stop what's coming. Yes it will hurt. Yes for weeks and possibly months. There is nothing you can really do to ease through it. If it makes you feel any better it is never the same for the next one. Getting over the next significant other is always easier. Nothing much you really can do. Just go on with life and time takes care of it. Or at least that worked for me in the past. Although listening to music can help, I played the hell outta Sea Change by Beck. Aside: That is a fantastic record, I listen to it on a very regular basis. I think for my first actual breakup I opted for Disintegration by the Cure.
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Post by dantesvirgil on Apr 2, 2009 7:38:44 GMT -5
My break ups involved listening to Rob Zombie. What's that say??
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Em.
New Member
I dreamt of a future unforged.
Posts: 31
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Post by Em. on Apr 2, 2009 7:57:42 GMT -5
This helped me get through shit:
This is the worst I'm gonna feel. From now on it's only gonna get better.
...and it did.
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Post by Sleepy on Apr 2, 2009 8:02:18 GMT -5
I feel somewhat better currently. I'm in school now and I hung out in the library this morning with a couple people I talk to frequently and also introduced myself to some others I don't really know. I also said hi to someone I sat with at lunch last term and he gave me a hearty, "It's good to have you back." So things seem to be improving. My ex is in my homeroom though, which seemed awkward. I told him that I felt somewhat better because I socialized in the library and he said he was proud of me for doing so.
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Post by deliciousdemon on Apr 2, 2009 10:47:19 GMT -5
This helped me get through shit: This is the worst I'm gonna feel. From now on it's only gonna get better. ...and it did. That's good sound advice, every day it just keeps getting prettier.
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Post by Sleepy on Apr 2, 2009 17:18:28 GMT -5
Yes, today was a dramatic contrast to yesterday. I hope tomorrow is the same way. Or better.
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Post by Sleepy on Apr 3, 2009 7:54:43 GMT -5
I wish this would go away. Today seems worse than yesterday. :/
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Post by Vene on Apr 3, 2009 10:38:48 GMT -5
It'll get better, I promise. Give yourself time to heal. Give yourself time to yourself, cry if you feel like it. I've found that just writing my thoughts down somewhere has helped get them out of my head if you have this problem. Vent online if you want. Vent to close friends.
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Post by Sleepy on Apr 3, 2009 11:34:05 GMT -5
Well I'm officially on spring break now, so for the week I'll be staying with my sister and her husband in a land far, far away. That'll be good.
Right now I sort of feel like the giraffe on that episode of Robot Chicken... Giraffe: Well this is just fucking perfect! Stupid quicksand! Stupid jungle! Agggh I wanna bite someone in the face! Motherfuck! Motherfuck! Motherfuck! Ohhhh stupid jungle! Aggghhh FUCK!!
EDIT: And my boyfriend is now dating someone else. I don't know if I should be depressed or angry or what. How the fuck does that happen three days after our breakup? I feel royally fucked.
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